Awkward much?

I teach sixth grade, and twelve year olds are delightfully entertaining.  They are just developing a more adult sense of humor, though they are still, appropriately, immature and prudish.  Gotta love em.

So today was marked by not one, not two, but three awkward moments in class....

We began our study of Greek Mythology during Literature, and while we read the story of Father Sky and Mother Earth creating the race of Titans, numerous students had to read the word "Uranus" out loud.  Chuckle chuckle, giggle giggle.  After the third round of it, I figured I may as well address the problem head on.  "Ok, ok.  They said anus.  Let's all laugh at the butt reference, and move on, shall we?"  We did, and we did.

Later during Social Studies, we were coloring and labeling a map of Ancient Greece.  The directions on the map said to label far more details than I deemed necessary for our study.  So I was instructing students on what not to label, including the cities of Ephesus, and the islands of Ithica and Lesbos.  "Lesbos" created quite a murmur of shy giggles around the room.  "Ok, ok. I hear you laughing.  Look, Lesbos is an island and a woman poet named Sappho came from there.  She wrote emotional poems professing her feelings of love for another woman.  So....that's where the word you're all thinking of comes from.  You learned a little something.  Cool?  Get over it."   And they did....

However, the ultimate in this trilogy of embarrassment happened during Language.  Students were working on a brainstorming activity, prewriting for an essay assignment when William raised his hand.  I approached him to offer help, when he said, frustrated, "Why is my handwriting so awful?"  As a former kindergarten teacher, I was able to explain to him, "Well, it looks like you learned to write using the ball-and-stick method.  The problem is your balls are too far from your stick."  After a second's shocked pause, the entire class, myself include, busted up laughing.  I walked away, wrapped up the lesson, and proceeded to speak as little as possible for the remainder of the day.

I'm kind of afraid to check my school email in the morning. "Dear Ms. M... Could you please explain to me how the topics of lesbians and balls were discussed in your classroom yesterday?!?!?"